Sunday, May 05, 2013

Are Fr Men More Romantic?

After four months of living in Paris I've come to the conclusion French men are more romantic.
If more romantic means openly affectionate and demonstrative.
There seems to be a lot of it going around - displays of affection.
Do French men have 'attachment issues'?
Long term maybe they're like all the other mecs/guys out there.
But short term I would say not.
Hand holding starts early.
I'm basing my theories on what I see, but it seems French toddlers are out of their strollers much sooner and out and about earlier.
Parents slow down to walk at the child's pace.
Time is taken.
And there's lots of hand holding right off the bat.
Lots of tactile contact
Could this effect later relationships?
Why not?
I didn't pose this 'Doisneau Kiss' nor arrange the back lighting...
On the other hand, French dogs seem much less romantically involved with each other or physically attached.
Being an extraterrestrial in Paris can lead to odd conclusions.
What do you think PBers?
Your opinion requested.


  1. My experience has been that French men are indeed more publicly romantic compared with American men. They are entirely capable of kissing their wife, their girlfriend and their mistress right there on the street, one after another.

    1. Excellent point PC
      I was sitting at a grand luncheon in Lyon and a world famous winemaker was there beside his wife and his mistress was at another table. There were several situations like that on site come to think of it. Very considerate IMHO. No one gets left out

    2. cyndi from SD12:48 PM

      I loved Paris Chronicles's comments,and your reply Carol.I agree totally.
      a bientot

  2. Anonymous9:21 AM

    Why not spread the love around?

  3. Parents slow down to the child's pace. time is taken. This is sooooo important. Parents need to allow children to process the world around them at the pace that works for them. We all hustle through life too quickly. Here is the USA, we leave them strapped into strollers longer because we can speed them through life. Such a shame. Excellent observations in this post!

  4. Sweet pictures, reflect well on the French male! :-)

    And the dogs made me smile. Loudly. Really.

    Merci for another beautiful post, a daily dose of joy. xxx

  5. Anonymous9:38 AM

    Paris is known as the 'city of light' but I call it the 'city of LOVE!'


  6. I have always wondered about the length of time that Americans keep their children in strollers these days- I don't remember this being so 40 years ago. I associated it more with a combination of an easy way to control the child without having to interact them, and an early set up for childhood obesity. The walking equivalent of plopping your kid in front of the TV for hours. The people in your photos do seem more engaged with each other than the average US citizen- Holding hands instead of gazing at hand held devices! ;)

    1. 'Holding hands instead of gazing at hand held devices!'

      Simply brill accessment.

      I'm beginning to think mobile devices are the worry beads of our time...

  7. Even their language is more romantic. It's always "cherie" rather than calling you by your name. And once when I broke up w/ my French boyfriend, a friend told me she consoled him by saying there would be other fish to catch and he responded "oui mais Jacqueline était la plus belle page de ma vie." An American would have said "she dumped me or she broke up with me." There's the difference

  8. Anonymous10:11 AM

    I am an American living in Paris and what you left out is very important. Elderly couples are always holding hands when walking in Paris also. That doesn't happen in New York City where I come from.

  9. In America people seem to be more focused on exposing the body rather than the affection. Perhaps why many women do indeed have Paris Envy.

  10. Maureen10:30 AM

    Carol, I totally agree with KBecker above! I could not have said it better. Take the child by the hand and go at the child's pace. Allow them to experience the world & all it's wonders , often for the first time. I hear Moms here in malls and on the street rushing their child "hurry up", "come on!" " move it!" So sad. I know they are juggling too much but all too soon that child will be an adult & gone for all intents and purposes from your life & you won't get it back, that precious time.

  11. Couples of all ages hold hands In Paris. I love to watch elderly couples walking with their shopping cart going to the market together. Families are out together in the parks on the week-end. Men are just more appreciative of women. One of our sunny days, I got on the bus and was obviously feeling happy. The busdriver remarked that I had a nice smile.
    That gave me an even brighter smile.

  12. Noelle10:47 AM

    Having had experience w. French and American boyfriends - the French are definitely more affectionate.
    They also cook and unusually well.

  13. I love this!

    Springtime in Paree!

  14. French men ARE more romantic. They simply enjoy the company of women, where as American men would rather hang out with their buddies. Just adds to the Paris envy...

    And Rebecca is sooo right about those darn games/phones. I see two-year-olds in shopping carts "playing" games while mom hurries around the store. What happened to books and, I don't know, talking? Vocab "lessons" abound in a grocery store! BTW, phones are banned from our dinner table... x Katie

  15. Anonymous11:10 AM

    I agree, definitely more romantic, and so are Italian men, even more so.
    ...they are more in tune with the feminine in ways American men are not.
    Love your posts,

    1. Someone once said, on a date with an American he will talk about himself to impress you.
      A European will ask about you..

    2. THAT is very, very true. An American man will tell you what he does for a living or where he vacationed or where he lives. A Frenchman wants to know about you and knows how to ask the questions in order to ispire an exchange. He will also notice a haircut or new shoes or the fine way your pants are cut and will compliment you on specifics. American men don’t...

    3. Soooo true La Bergere,
      And they don't reel off their past romantic escapades like a laundry list (for the most part)one hopes like some mecs...

  16. I"m a 60 + woman who, recently, with another woman my age, met a Frenchman at an event. He spent quite a bit of time visiting with us and even had to be cajoled by his co-workers to continue the tour they were on. That would NEVER have happened with an American man.

  17. Were those couples French? Or tourists? Odds are they were tourists. I think French men terribly unattractive, too. But that's just my opinion.
    Jeannie---who has probably been here too long.

    1. The gal in the big running shoes was speaking French..

  18. Anonymous12:45 PM

    What a super thought provoking post today!

  19. Great post, Carol, well observed. Now next I want to hear more on your theories about the romantic life of French dogs, please - don't just taunt us with a throw-away line!

  20. Don't know US men but had a Scottish boyfriend: yes, definitely French and Italian men ARE more romantic and prone to show affection in pubblic.
    They don't run from a hug or a kiss if they feel like it...or their partners ;o)
    While I perfectly agree with the strollers thought, even in Iatly children are strapped in strollers for far too long.
    My son began walking beside me when he was little older than 2 and it was a joy to slow down for him.
    Appereantly, and sadly, it isn't like this any more.

  21. It's been quite a while since I was in Paris, but I do remember coming home and feeling I was maybe suddenly unattractive, as no men seemed to notice me here in the US the way French men did! Hahaaaa.

  22. Yes! I firmly believe French men are more romantic! They just seem less inhibited when it comes to public displays of affection. My boyfriend is French, and I remember I was so (pleasantly) surprised when he started holding my hand the second day I knew him!

    P.S. I'm heading back to Paris this week to visit him and I was planning to pack boots, but I was worried it was too late into Spring to wear boots. I felt a lot better when I saw your post about all the boots in Paris right now!!

    District Delights

    1. I saw Uggs on the street yesterday and it was quite warm so not to worry
      Bring those boots
      Clever you to find a nice French guy
      Bonne chance!

  23. Anonymous2:22 PM

    This struck me with me french man. Early in our relationship in a restaurant in Washington, DC, he kissed me and played with my hair for a few seconds...a few moments later he leaned back and apologized for being too public with his affection. He was aware of American ways and had simply not gotten used to it. Hopelessly in love, I asked me to kiss me again...this time longer. Americans stared. ;)

  24. French men definately seem to be more aware of women just because they're women but some of the affection and kissing may be due to the fact that they walk so much more than we do. It's hard to give someone a spontaneous kiss when you're driving a car and that seems to be where we live.

  25. After following your blog for a long time, I know that the kids seem to have an added importance than here in the US. That's how it seems, anyway. They get a lot of love and attention.
    If that hand holding affection carries over into adulthood, it would make sense that both sexes would be more demonstrably romantic.
    When you mention the mistresses, though, it gets very confusing :)

  26. Anonymous3:10 PM

    I would not find a French man, or any man for that manner, romantic at all if he had a wife, mistress and girlfriend! If you have a wife, respect her and respect the institution of marriage. As a French woman, I love my American husband and I must say he is quite romantic. So many silly generalizations in these comments. There is good, bad and in between in all cultures and countries. How I wish people would remember that!

  27. My opinion? I'm pretty sure those dogs are brothers.

    1. Always so practical and logical Jeanette...

  28. Anonymous4:12 PM

    One thing is for certain - Italian men, esp from the South (Rome downwards) are much more demonstrative than the British / American / even Australian male. They may not love more but outward displays of affection are pretty nice to receive. Oh yes people in Paris / Rome walk more and we take our cars (Australians and our American lady says there too). Because we CAN! They can't. Our cars are in our gardens beside our house; jump in and off we go. Better than taking the lift down 6 floors then spending a half-hour trying to remember where you found a street-park for your car last. Gwendoline in Australia.

    1. Frankly I'd rather hold someone's hand IMHO...

  29. Dated F And E..married my Frenchman.
    I think they have an edge.
    I look at my 4 grandsons..
    We spent the whole weekend with 3 of them..and when they write and talk to us in French..there is an edge.
    My son in law..their terribly charming:-)
    His last name is Latendresse:-)

  30. Anonymous5:46 PM

    Wonderful blog & photos. There is certainly more open affection in France/ Italy, too. Maybe anywhere outside the US
    Keep up the good work
    cheers/ Larry

  31. What a heart-warning and lovely observation you've shared with us. I especially like the children walking hand-in-hand with parents. I'll bet Parisian toddlers don't have iPads either!

  32. Great post, loved all the observations.

  33. Well isn't Paris supposed to be the most romantic city in the World? That's a lot to live up to.

    They must practice from an early age. I think all the hand holding is sweet.

    1. And France has the highest birth rate in Europe so...

  34. Anonymous2:02 AM

    I agree with you and am especially intrigued by older couples in their romantic promenades. I took this last September in les Jardins de Luxembourg.
    don't know what these guys are like once you get them indoors, but they certainly seem romantic outdoors!
    Love your blog,
    Beverly, in Californa

  35. what a lovely romantic post!


  36. L A B1:56 PM

    Just LOVE this post! Sigh.... :-)

  37. ... Strictly from my experience only ... I am American and find American men the best "all around" ... in general, that is ... when I see French men fawning over a woman, I think it's just "silly" a bit. I like the less obvious forms of public affection, physical but not too obvious. It's more sensual.

    What a corker of a post ... great job.

    Karen in CT

  38. Having been through both French and American relationships and happily settling on a Frenchman I will say yes they are more romantic, but I think alot of it has to do with living in the moment. Whether the moment is for the hour or the year, they seem not to sweat the small stuff and live for the here and now much more so than American men.

  39. What an interesting post! I would first separate affection from romance though - romance is about emotion, sweeping your partner off her feet, and creating an air of love.
    The French guys I know are not more romantic than their other male counterparts. They can display PDAs, sure, but don't necessarily create a greater aura of love. I know one 40 year old French man (engaged twice as well) who never bought a single piece of jewelry for a woman. Hmm, that doesn't seem tres romantic! I do think that French men have a stereotype in their favor in this regard.
    I do love all the hand holding couples here as well as the affection shown to children. French, Italian, American - any man showing affection and creating an air of love with his wife and family is romantic!

    Chic 'n Cheap Living

  40. I do think the French are more physical. They even bump into you more here...
    I went out with a very UNromantic French guy for over 2 years, but he had emigrated to the US and lost his mojo I guess...
    There is always the one who doesn't fit the stereotype

  41. jessica caffe8:52 PM

    Dear carol, im reading all yours post (one week ago I left disneylandparis to work in a hotel in paris A DREAM CAME TRUE) and im happy to know that your bday is 2 days before mine (im 19 may =) maybe taurus girls loves paris and left everything to live like expats here??? And like I latin girl like i am i can say that FRENCH BOYS ARE MORE ROMANTIC than other cultures boys... my french boy is a sweet!!! just like a macarron hahahaa and dont worry i still invite u to go to disneyparis =) Im so happy left there... CAUSE WORK IN PARIS IS SO FRENCH!!! =) LOVE IT!!! just need know LIVE in paris again =) and please try to go to PROVINS ... its a medieval city sooooo beautiful and dont worry... im waiting for your book ...=) all the time u need ill be waiting =) thanks for all tips dear !!! love your blog =)


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